Sh!t Hudson Says: Volume 1

Being nearly 3, I am thoroughly entertained each and every day by what Hudson says. He is so funny, and catches me off guard when I least expect it.

Toddlers truly are sponges; soaking up every piece of information thrown their way, parroting it back out spontaneously, and often executing their knowledge with impeccable timing, causing their parents to cringe with embarrassment.

Hudson, you rock at this skill. Thanks for always making me laugh.

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Enjoy this list of awe-inspiring quotes from the one and only, Hudson Michael James...

 

  • While watching female beach volleyball with my Dad during this year's Summer Olympics, Hudson exclaims, "I want to see that lady's boobies, Papa!" 

 

  • While waking up in my bed a few months back, Hudson has a nice surprise for me: "Good morning, mommy!" *sits on my face and toots*

 

  • While in a fully occupied elevator in our building: Me - "We have to go to the store to get a few things first, ok? Hudson - "Ok, what do you need, mommy? Wine?"

 

  • While sitting in the food court at the mall having lunch one day, Hudson was obsessively staring at someone at the next table. I was occupied with getting his meal set up to eat and didn't notice what had caught his eye. He pointed his finger and yelled, "Look, mommy, a baby man!" (This man was a little person.) I acknowledged Hudson's finding, but he continued to repeat this same line over and over again, having me wanting to sink to below the table, not reappearing until the end of winter.

 

  • Me to Hudson: "Where do you get all your energy from?" Hudson: "From papa's belly button!"

 

  • Scrolling through my phone checking out Instagram photos, Hudson noticed a picture of a Victoria's Secret model that I follow and says, "Mommy, go back to that picture. I saw that lady's belly button. I want to see her tummy again. Ooooo she's wearing her bathing suit, Mommy. So pretty!" (She was actually in lingerie. I'll be more careful scrolling on social media from now on.)

 

  • While stepping out of the shower one recent morning, Hudson was waiting for me with his hand on his hip and clearly angry with me. I asked him what was wrong and he replied, "Mommy, you forgot to close blinds. Not good, Mommy! Somebody could have seen your vagina!"

 

  • After some recent Halloween decorating at my Dad's house, he proceeded to ask, "Papa, where you get that pumpkin from?" My dad replied, "Ohhh, a long time ago... Granny bought it. Before you were born. Hudson paused then inquisitively asked, "Ohhh, when I was dead?"

 

  • While Facetiming with his dad at the end of a long, fun filled day with, Hudson's dad asked, "So, what did you do today, Hudson?" to which Hudson's answered immediately, "Well, we walked to the store and we got mommy some wine." 
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Can anyone relate to any of these? What's the funniest thing your toddler has ever said? Comment below!

Try keeping your own journal of funny things your kids say so that you can look back in years to come and laugh just as hard as you did the first time.  

You'll thank me later,  

Sass xo